Two donuts. Yep. I did it. I'm generally good at avoiding gluten because of a sensitivity, but those salesmen show up at work with a box of donuts and I'm toast...errr... fried? There isn't a person on the planet who thinks to herself, my body is going to thank me if I eat two donuts this morning. So why does anyone in her right mind eat donuts at all?

I asked myself that as my stomach churned in rejection of my decision.

Last year I was reading a book with a dear friend. It encouraged us to take our health seriously and one chapter especially reached out, slapped me in the face and said, "Wake up! You're awesome... quit treating yourself like you're not."

In that chapter, Lysa challenged us to re-evaluate what we mean when we say, "I deserve this." You know... the classic, "I went for a run, I deserve this cookie." Or the even more common, "I had a horrible day today, I deserve TWO cookies."

The truth is, I don't deserve a cookie... I deserve to live till I'm 80 and still have my health and even a little energy! I have been limiting myself with my beliefs about myself. That sugar is all I was made for.

It's so easy to slip into that thinking for me in so many ways: "I worked hard today, I deserve to get lost on social media for hours." Why not take that walk on the beach instead? "I have a little extra spending money, I deserve a new outfit/shoes." What about saving for a vacation? The point here is not that it's wrong to eat or buy clothes, but is that really what makes the hard times worth it? I think there might be more that I was made for.

I realize, in some ways this is a contradiction to my last post. But actually, it's the same post. They are both about the way we view ourselves. Last week I was stuck in telling myself I didn't deserve things that are healthy for me and now I'm trying to remember not to tell myself that I do deserve unhealthy things. It's a complete flip flop. I had them both wrong.

Anybody there with me? Or is there anything in your life you've realized you've gotten flip flopped? I'd love to be enlightened!

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